Put Oneself In Somebody,s Shoes 替人設想

 |2019.03.10
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【提要】

《禮記.中庸》說:「體群臣也。」南宋理學家朱熹解釋為:「體,謂設以身處其地而察其心也。」也就是:「將他人的處境,納入自己思考範疇的境界」;愛因斯坦說:「對於我來說,生命的意義,在於設身處地替人著想,憂他人之憂,樂他人之樂。」

凡事多替別人想,只是舉手之勞,卻是對他人有極大的鼓舞,有時甚至可以改善周圍的氣氛。

Tina was a six-year-old cute girl. She is very fond of wooden toys, especially a beautiful wood horse gifted by her uncle when she was 2. The wooden horse has been her close pal and her pet. She has a 9-year-old brother.

One day, She went on a vacation to a nature resort in the woods with her family. She, by all means, carried her favorite wooden horse with her. She enjoyed her holiday with her family in the woods.

While she was packing things with her brother as they planned to return home, the wooden horse fell down and one leg was broken. Tina was terribly sad and sobbing for her horse.

She was very upset. They packed all the things and left the woods. Entire family tried to cheer up the sweet little girl, but Tina was oddly quiet, kept her eyes downcast. Tina's brother tried to console her a lot.

They had a break for lunch and Tina refused to eat. Her mom requested her to eat something, she ate a very little amount of food.

While others were eating, she sat quietly in their car. Her brother came to her and kissed her cheek, try to talk some sense to her:

"Tina dear, don't worry, don't get upset dear. It is only a wooden toy. The horse doesn't have a life like us and it is just a lifeless thing. Don't be so sad for the broken leg. Even if the horse loses its tail, it won't be hurting the horse. Even if all four legs are broken, the wooden horse remains the same. Even if the horse loses its head, it won't be painful. I will buy a new wood horse for you!"

Tina replied, "You think it doesn't matter that a leg of my pet toy was broken?"

Her brother replied, "Yes dear!"

Tina replied, "Yes brother you are right. It won't be a major issue for you even if the horse is broken into pieces. But if you are in my age, if you had a pet as I had, you will feel how painful it would be to even if a small part of the horse is hurt!"

Her brother left silently!

Just like Tina, everyone has different feelings about different aspects. What we considered of no importance will possibly be a treasure of somebody else!

Many people judge others before they know the whole story. It is important to put oneself in other people's shoes because it can help one to better understand everything, and it may shed some light on what actually happened.

【解說】

娣娜是一個可愛的六歲女孩。她非常喜歡木製玩具,特別是她兩歲時叔叔送她的漂亮木馬。木馬是她的親密朋友也是寵物。她有一個九歲的哥哥。

有一天,她和家人一起去樹林裡的自然生態園區度假。當然也帶著她最心愛的木馬。她很享受與家人在林裡度過的假期。

當家人計畫回家時,她和哥哥一起打包行李,木馬摔了下來,其中一條腿斷了。娣娜非常傷心,為她的木馬低聲抽泣。

她非常沮喪。他們收拾好所有東西後,離開了樹林。 全家人都試圖讓這個可愛的小女孩開心一點,但娣娜出奇地安靜,低頭不語。娣娜的哥哥試圖安慰她。

他們停車休息吃午餐時,娣娜拒絕進食。她的媽媽要她吃點東西,她只吃了非常少量的食物。

當其他人繼續吃飯時,她靜靜地坐在車裡。她的哥哥坐到她身邊、親她的臉頰,試著對她說些道理:

「娣娜,親愛的,別擔心,也別生氣。這只是一個木頭玩具。這匹馬不像我們這樣,只是一個沒有生命的東西,不要因為它斷了腿而傷心。即使失去它的尾巴也不會傷到這馬,即使全部四條腿都斷了,這木馬仍然是一樣的。即使馬的頭沒了,它也不會痛苦。我會給妳買一匹新的木馬!」

娣娜回答哥哥說:「你認為,我的寵物玩具的一條腿斷了,並不重要?」

她的哥哥回答她說:「是啊,親愛的!」

娣娜回答:「是的,哥哥,你是對的。對你來說,即使這匹馬斷成碎片,也不會是什麼問題。但如果你是我這個年紀,如果你像我一樣把它當成寵物,你就會覺得,即使傷了馬的一小部分,也會感到痛苦!」

她哥哥無言地離開了。

就像娣娜一樣,每個人對不同的事物會有完全不同的感受。我們認為不重要的,卻可能是其他人的珍寶!

有許多人,在完全了解事情的全貌之前,就先評判他人。設身處地替人設想是很重要的,因為這可以幫助人們清楚地理解一切,並且讓真相清楚呈現。

pull your socks up

Tom’s dad:French: he takes no interest in the subject. Maths: he has the ability but refuses to work. Biology: a very poor result. English: he has done no work at all this term..... Hmmm.....

Tom’s mom:It’s not a very good report, is it.

Tom’s dad:You can say that again. Have you talked to Tom about it?

Tom’s mom:Yes. In fact, I let him read it.

Tom’s dad:And what was his reaction?

Tom’s mom:It didn’t seem to bother him.

Tom’s dad:What’s the matter with him? Can’t he see he’ll never get anywhere if he goes on like this?

Tom’s mom:That’s exactly what I said. He won’t pass his exams next term unless he begins to put some effort into his work. And if he fails his exams he’ll lose his place at University.

Tom’s dad:Yes. If he’s serious about going to college, he really will have to pull his socks up.

WOW!

原來如此

by all means

「by all means」是「務必盡一切努力」,例如:

We must finish the task before the deadline by all means.(我們無論如何要在截止日期之前完成任務。)

You can protest by all means, but keep a sense of reason.(你可以用各種方式抗議,但要保持理性。)

Oh, please keep up the good work, by all means, don't let me interrupt.(哦,你做得很好,請繼續保持,一定不要被我打擾了。)

downcast

「downcast」是(情緒低落的)目光下垂,例如:

With downcast faces, they ate the simple dinner and never speak again.(他們帶著情緒低落的神情,吃了簡單的晚餐後,再也沒有說話。)

I thought you were looking a little downcast this morning.(我覺得你今天早上看起來有點落寞。)

She seemed very downcast at the news.(他對這個消息似乎感覺很沮喪。)

put oneself in somebody's shoes

「put oneself in somebody's shoes」的意思是「站在他人的角度或立場想問題」,也就是「換位思考」,例如:

Before being quick to judge someone for their actions, you should always try to put yourself in their shoes.(在對他人的行為遽下結論之前,你應該試著站在他的立場思考。)

Try to understand our customer better, we put yourself in their shoes.(為了嘗試多了解我們的客戶,我們以顧客的角度思考。)

Put yourself in our teacher's place, and then you'd understand why she was so upset about the exam result.(用我們老師的觀點來看,你就會明白她為什麼對考試結果感到沮喪。)

拉高你的襪子(加倍努力)

爸爸:(成績評語)法語:他對這門功課不感興趣;數學:他有能力但拒絕努力;生物學:結果很糟糕;英語:這個學期他沒有做過任何功課……嗯……

媽媽:這成績單不怎麼樣,是嗎?

爸爸:你說得對極啦,你和湯姆談過這個嗎?

媽媽:談過了,其實,我讓他自己看(成績評語)。

爸爸:那他的反應是什麼?

媽媽:他似乎完全不受影響。

爸爸:他怎麼回事? 如果繼續這樣下去,他難道不明白他什麼學校都上不了?

媽媽:這正是我所告訴他的。除非他開始努力用功,否則他下學期考試不會過。如果考試不及格,他將失去升大學的資格。

爸爸:是的。如果他認真考慮要上大學,他真的必須要加把勁了。

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