提要

「gossip」是毫無根據、誣蔑或挑撥離間的壞話。

英國哲學家、數學家和邏輯學家羅素（Bertrand Russell）曾說：「從來沒有人把他人的美德，當成八卦的內容來傳遞。」（Nobody ever gossips about other people's secret virtues.）

「好人」可以一輩子都不說人壞話。說別人的壞話、批評不在場的人是一種懦弱的行為，那些不在場的人無法替自己辯駁。在毀謗別人同時，也讓自己的名聲岌岌可危。

"Happy birthday, Princess!" Mom and Dad presented the large box to 12-year-old Courtney with such great pride.

"What is it, what is it, Daddy?" Courtney tore through the paper with excitement, very aware that the box had holes poked in the top. "Is it a pet, is it?" she squealed and then she stopped and just stared down in wonder.

Standing in the middle of the box, just barely 3 inches tall, was a tiny human-like figure. It had arms and legs, a head and a face, but it was so oddly shaped. Its legs were furry and the fur was a flow of purples, greens and pinks. The feet were not feet at all but tiny hooves. The hooves had toes with sharp, tiny toenails for gripping. The torso, arms, neck and face were similarly wildly colored, so bright it hurt their eyes, and its head was pointy so it always looked surprised and fascinated.

Courtney named the gremlin Stanley. Every time she called its name, it squeaked and did a dance. Stanley stayed in his box, very happy at first, but then he slowly got sick.

One night, Courtney was watching Stanley and talking to Amy on the phone.

"Amy, did you see what Janie was wearing? Wow, it was so stupid! She has such ugly clothes!" Just then a big squeak erupted from the little box. Stanley jumped to his feet and did a dance. "Amy, it’s Stanley. He got better. We were gossiping and he suddenly ate something and got well. He eats gossip, Amy, he eats gossip!"

And it was true. Each time Courtney gossiped, Stanley grew larger. Then came the Thursday when Courtney broke the rules, and she sneaked Stanley into her backpack and took him to school. Oh, the giggling that went off in the halls when all of the 6th grade girls gathered to hold Stanley and pet him and tell him how cute he was. And then they started.

"Nikki called Cassie a dumb girl....." "Sandra has ugly hair....."

And with each tiny piece of gossip, Stanley did a back flip, danced and grew bigger and fatter, as the gremlin was handed from girl to girl, he slipped to the floor. The click of his toenails on the school floor was never heard.

"Courtney, where's Stanley?" Amy whispered when class had already started. Suddenly, from the back of the room near the door, came a low-pitched yip. All eyes turned and Stanley stood on the assignments table. He was now 3 feet tall and very fat. The gossips today were so good for him.

The students began to panic at the appearance of the large, surly gremlin. It gave a low yelp, then danced and flipped, but Stanley was so large by now that he broke the table and escaped into the hallway.

"Joe had bad breath....." "Leslie cheated on the test....."

The gossip food streamed from every gathering of students, in the bathrooms, classrooms and hallway. The flood of gossip became so strong it could be seen as a green cloud moving rapidly toward the gym. Suddenly, a lone figure came marching down the hall, a large commanding man who shouted orders. The students sprang into action to obey. The principal Mr. Bixley spoke with such authority he didn't need a microphone:

"Students, to the gym. We are going to put a stop to this." The doors to the gym burst open before Mr. Bixley and the students flooded in behind him and then stopped. There at the other end, a full 20 feet tall and fat and ugly, was Stanley. Mr. Bixley and Stanley faced each other like cowboys in a western duel. The principal spoke.

"Heather, come here, tell the truth."

Heather moved to the front, to a microphone the AV guy had quickly brought up.

"Leslie didn't cheat on the test. I lied. Leslie is a good student."

"Phillip, Jessica, Sarah…tell the truth," the principal commanded.

One by one the students stepped forward and spoke the truth into the microphone, correcting their gossiping lies. Each time, Stanley moaned, grabbed his ears and cried big green gremlin tears.

"Now, Courtney, come here and tell the truth," Mr. Bixley ordered.

Courtney stepped up, looked nervous and then said loudly into the microphone, "JANIE HAS PRETTY CLOTHES!"

That was all it took. Stanley fell back into the bleachers and moaned so loudly the students held their ears. He did a forward flip and then just like that with a loud BLIP, he vanished, leaving just a puddle of green gossip goo on the gym floor.

"EVERYBODY BACK TO CLASS!" commanded the good principal and with that, there was never again another gossip gremlin in Courtney’s town.

解說

「生日快樂，小公主！」媽媽和爸爸對著滿十二歲的寇特妮展示一個大盒子，表情自豪。

「爸爸，那是什麼呢？」寇特妮興奮地撕開包裝紙，看到盒頂有透氣孔，「是寵物嗎，是嗎？」她尖叫著停下來，盯著大盒子。

盒子裡的是一個三英寸高、很像人的小傢伙。牠有胳膊有腿、頭和臉，但形狀卻很奇怪。牠的腿毛茸茸的，毛皮是紫色、綠色、粉色混雜。腳有小蹄，蹄子有尖甲方便抓取。身體各部的毛色混雜明亮，相當炫目，尖尖的小頭讓牠看來驚訝又迷惘。

寇特妮替小精靈取名為史丹利。每當她叫牠的名字時，牠都會吱吱叫、跳跳舞。一開始，史丹利在盒子裡很開心，然後慢慢的，牠生病了。

有一天晚上，寇特妮看顧史丹利同時，跟愛咪講電話。

「愛咪，你看到詹妮穿什麼了嗎？哇，真是太蠢了！她有這樣醜的衣服！」就在此時，一陣巨大的吱吱嘰嘰叫從盒子裡傳出。史丹利跳起舞來了。 「愛咪，是史丹利。牠變好了，我們在閒聊八卦，牠突然吃了些什麼東西就好起來了。牠吃閒話，愛咪，他吃閒話！」

果真如此。每次寇特妮閒聊八卦，史丹利就變大。接著，寇特妮破壞了規定，在周四那天，她把史丹利偷藏背包裡，帶牠上學。哦，所有六年級的女生圍在一起，拍拍抱抱史丹利，告訴牠有多麼的可愛，在大廳裡嘻嘻笑，然後，她們開始了：

「妮基叫凱西傻女孩……」「珊德拉的頭髮有夠醜……」

隨著每個小小的閒話八卦，史丹利都會來個後空翻、跳舞，牠變得愈來愈大、愈胖，這位小精靈在女孩手裡傳來傳去、溜到了地板上。牠蹄子的尖甲，在學校的地板上敲出前所未聞的聲響。

「寇特妮，史丹利哪兒去啦？」開始上課時，愛咪輕聲地問。突然，從教室後面傳來低沉的吠叫。所有的眼睛轉向身後，史丹利站在作業桌上。牠現在有三英尺高了、非常胖。今天在學校聽到的閒話把牠餵得超飽。

目睹一個這麼巨大狂野的精靈，學生們開始驚慌失措。低喊之後，牠跳舞翻滾，但史丹利現在這麼大的體積，這些動作打碎了桌子、逃到了走廊。

「喬有口臭……」「萊絲麗考試作弊……」

每個學生聚會的盥洗室、教室和走廊，「八卦食物」供應源源不絕。八卦如洪水般洶湧，像綠色的雲彩迅速向健身房移動。突然，一個孤獨的身影在大廳前進、大聲指揮，學生們無不服從。校長比克斯利很有權威，而且不需要麥克風：

「同學們，到體育館集合。我們要了結這件事。」在比克斯利先生眼前，體育館的大門被擠開，學生迅速蜂擁而入。在體育館另一端，是一個二十英尺高、胖又醜的史丹利。校長比克斯利和史丹利對峙，就像在西部片中決鬥的牛仔。校長發話了：

「海瑟，到這裡來，開始說真話。」

海瑟走到同學前面，對著音效人員迅速拿來的麥克風：

「萊絲麗沒在考試中作弊。我撒了謊。萊絲麗是好學生。」

「菲利普，潔西卡，莎拉……說實話。」校長下指令。

學生一個接一個地走向前，對著麥克風說出真話，糾正自己的的流言蜚語。史丹利也一次次地呻吟、捂住耳朵，大聲哭出精靈的綠眼淚。

「現在，寇特妮到這裡來說實話。」比克斯利先生下令。

寇特妮走上前，表情很緊張，然後大聲地向麥克風說：「詹妮的衣服很漂亮！」

這麼做果然見效。史丹利跌落看台、呻吟音量之大，讓學生們紛紛捂起耳朵。牠做了一個向前翻轉，發出清脆的短音，然後消失了，只留下一坨綠色的八卦黏液在體育館地板上。

「大家回去上課」，這位優秀的校長繼續指揮。經過此事，在寇特妮居住的這個城鎮，再也不會出現閒話精靈了。

WOW!

原來如此

oddly

「odd」是「奇數、單數」，例如：Three and five are odd numbers.（三和五是奇數。）

「odd」、「Oddly」是「稀奇古怪的」，例如：

Oddly, he wasn’t as upset by it as he thought he should be.（稀奇的是，他並未像自認地那麼沮喪。）

His voice sounded oddly resonant in the empty room.（他的聲音在這空曠的房裡聽起來異常嘹亮。）

Oddly enough, cat and dog got on rather well.（古怪得很，貓與狗居然相處得很好。）

fascinated

「fascinate」是「強烈吸引、令人著迷」，例如：

We like toys and are fascinated by them.（我們熱愛玩具，可以說是著了迷。）

He was fascinated especially by Postmodernism, and this fascination never left him.（他特別沉迷於後現代主義，這種迷戀從未止息。）

The ancient egyptians were fascinating people.（古埃及人是令人神往的民族。）

step forward

「step forward」是「站出來、進一步」 ，也有「自告奮勇、挺身而出」的意思，例如：

He took a step forward to test me.（他更進一步來試探我。）

She expected to see someone would step forward to solve the problem.（她指望有人能挺身而出解決這問題。）

Thomas Edison once stated, “I am not discouraged because every wrong attempt discarded is another step forward.”（美國科學發明家愛迪生曾說：「我不會因失敗氣餒，因為每一個錯誤的嘗試，都向前邁出一步。）